Feminine Side
Bob, who's gay, decides to go out for a good time and ends up at a gay bar. There he meets an attractive young man named Johnny who he talks to all evening. When the night comes to …
Categorie
Jokes
Late to Class
Teacher: Why are you late to class? Student: Because of a road sign, I have to pass on the way! Teacher: And what has the sign got to do with it? Student: It says, "School ahead, go slow."
Suite 16
A very young couple exhibiting signs of extreme nervousness, timidly approached the check-in desk of a large Manhattan hotel. "Good evening, sir," said the official behind the desk, favoring the young man with a perceptive wink. "Suite 16?" …
Boater Gift
While at a marine-supply store stocking up on equipment for his boat, Jim also purchased an inflatable life preserver. "It was my wife's idea," he explained to the grizzled salesman at the counter. "She's buying it for me …
Piano Tuner
The doorbell rang and the lady of the house discovered a workman, complete with tool chest, on the front porch. "Madam," he announced, "I'm the piano tuner." The lady exclaimed, "Why, I didn't send for a piano tuner." …
Magician
Mike picked up an attractive woman, named Linda, who flagged down his car in a seedy part of town. As they rode, he asked her what she did for a living. Linda winked at Mike and said, "I'm …
Dude in the Desert
There is a California dude walking through a desert. He's wearing shorts, sunglasses, a towel and listening to music on his iPod. He's having a good time. Suddenly he sees a caravan approaching. He stops the Arabs and …
Salesmanship
John applied for a job as an insurance salesman. Where the form requested "prior experience," he wrote "lifeguard." That was it. Nothing else. "We're looking for someone who can not only sell insurance, but who can sell himself …
Alligators
A New Yorker was being shown around the back country of Louisiana by his cousin. "Is it true that an alligator won't attack you if you carry a flashlight?" he asked. The cousin smirked, "Depends on how fast …
Toaster
While visiting his mother in the hospital, Jim stopped in the cafeteria for breakfast. He set a piece of bread on the moving toaster rack and waited for it to pass under the heated coils and return golden …
Spell Your Name
Working at an airline ticket counter, Jim pulled up a passenger's reservation that showed his name as "Cole, Pheven." "I'd like to be certain our information is correct," I said to him. "What is your first name?" "It's …
Voices
Old man Murray goes to the doctor with a very worried look on his face. "Doctor," he says, "you've got to help me. Do you remember those voices in my head I always complain about?" "Yes," the doctor …
Boring
Mary: I can't believe how boring my life has become. Jill: What do you mean? Mary: The only time I hear myself say, "I'm coming" is when I'm trying to tell my cat I'm getting his food ready!
Little Johnny’s Turtle
"Mommy, my turtle is dead," Little Johnny sorrowfully told his mother, holding the turtle out to her in his hand. The mother kissed him on the head, then said, "That's all right. We'll wrap him in tissue paper, …
Make-up Sex
Mary: One time my ex and I had hardly finished fighting, when I inadvertently started another argument. Jill: What happened? Mary: Well, my ex suggested I might enjoy some "make-up sex", and I innocently asked, "Does it have …
Paris Airport
An elder American absent mindedly arrived at French customs at Paris airport and fumbled for his passport. "You have been to France before, Monsieur?" the customs officer asked sarcastically. The ancient Yank admitted that he had been to …
Little Johnny’s Homework
"Little Johnny, did your mother help you with your homework last night?" the teacher asked. "No, she did it all," he replied.
Mousepad
In a computer shop: Customer: "I'd like a mousepad, please." Salesperson: "Certainly sir, we've got a large variety." Customer: "But will they be compatible with my computer?"
Life after Death
“Do you believe in life after death?” the boss asked one of his employees. “Yes, sir,” the clerk replied. “That’s good,” the boss said. “After you left early yesterday to go to your grandmother’s funeral, she stopped in …
Blonde Hijacker
Airport Security alerted an airline crew to keep an eye a blonde passenger who appeared excessively nervous and shifty-eyed. Soon after takeoff, the blonde man called a stewardess to his seat and said, "I have a live grenade …