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„What’s your father’s occupation?” asked the school secretary on the first day of the new academic year.

„He’s a magician, Ma’am,” said Little Johnny.

„How interesting. What’s his favorite trick?” she asked.

„He saws people in half,” answered Little Johnny.

„Gosh that’s exciting. Next question. Any brothers or sisters?” continued the secretary.

„Three half brothers and two half sisters.” replied Little Johnny.

When the wealthy businessman choked on a fish bone at a restaurant, he was fortunate that a doctor was seated at a nearby table.

Springing up, the doctor skillfully removed the bone and saved his life. As soon as the fellow had calmed himself and could talk again, he thanked the surgeon enthusiastically and offered to pay him for his services. „Just name the fee,” he croaked gratefully.

„Okay,” replied the doctor. „How about half of what you’d have offered when the bone was still stuck in your throat?”

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