A bride called to make a change to her wedding registry. It is common, almost expected, that a bride will change something on her registry at least once (dishes, color of towels, etc.).

The Customer Service Representative told her that J.C. Penney would be happy to make the change. He asked if the bride wanted to change the dishes or the linens.

The bride said, „No, keep all that. I just wanted to change the name of the groom.”

After the lavish wedding reception, the newlyweds retired to their Honeymoon Suite. The groom turned down the lights and found some nice CDs to stack on the player. Then he excused himself and returned in pajamas and robe.

He opened a bottle of champagne and poured them each a drink, unaware that his new bride had already had more than enough to drink. Finally, he took the girl of his dreams, whom he had wed after a whirlwind courtship, by the hand and tenderly began to lead her towards the bedroom.

„God!” she muttered, „every stinking time I go out with a guy it always ends up the same way.”

Leaving the wedding reception the honeymoon couple hailed a cab to take them to their romantic boutique hotel in the hills. The driver wasn’t too sure how to get there and said he would ask directions when they got closer.

Meanwhile, the lovers couldn’t wait and got down to it on the back seat. Seeing a fork in the road the driver said, „I take the next turn, right?”

„No way, get your own,” said the groom, „this one’s all mine.”

* grivă apare ca substantiv, varianta feminină a mai vechiului griv; este un termen popular care înseamnă „căţea cu blana de culoare pestriţă, alb cu negru”; are genitiv-dativul grivei şi pluralul grive. Din aceeaşi familie lexicală, este menţionat *Grivei („nume de câine”), substantiv propriu masculin.

! grizzly este substantiv masculin; pluralul grizzly se articulează grizzly-i

! groom vine din engleză, de unde păstrează şi pronunţia (oo = u); este substantiv masculin cu pluralul groomi

* gros-plan este franţuzism (gros se pronunţă gro), substantiv neutru cu pluralul gros-planuri

! grunz („bucată dintr-o materie tare şi sfărâmicioasă; bulgăre”) este substantiv masculin cu pluralul grunji (forma anterioară grunzuri a dispărut)

Diferenţe lingvistice

Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, „Why is the bride dressed in white?”

„Because white is the color of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life.”

The child thought about this for a moment, then said, „So why is the groom wearing black?”