After putting her children to bed, a mother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. At last she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern warnings.
As she left the room, she heard her three-year-old say with a trembling voice, „Who was THAT?”
A girl was visiting her blonde friend and noticed she had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex.
Her friend said, „Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?”
Whereupon the blonde responded, „What else you gonna name watch dogs?”
„How long have you been driving without a tail light, buddy?” demanded the policeman.
The driver jumped out, ran to the rear of his car, and gave a low moan.
His distress was so great that the cop was moved to ease up on him a bit.
„Aw, come now,” he said, „you don’t have to take it so hard. It isn’t that serious.”
„It isn’t?” cried the motorist. „What happened to my boat and trailer?”
When Mr. Johnson had reached the age of seventy-five, he suddenly began chasing the young chicks.
A neighbor brought this behavior to the attention of his wife. „What are you gonna do about it?” she asked.
„Who cares?” said Mrs. Johnson. „Let him chase girls! Dogs chase cars – but when they catch them, they can’t drive!”
Jim stopped at a fast food restaurant, intrigued by a sign which offered fat-free fries. He decided to give them a try, but he was dismayed when the clerk pulled a batch of fries from the fryer dripping with fat, and then put a bag of these fries in with his order.
„Just a minute,” Jim said, „those aren’t fat-free.”
„Yes, they are,” the clerk replied, „we only charge for the potatoes, the fat is free.”
As cab drivers oftentimes do, the driver was darting in and out of heavy traffic with complete abandon. After a few hair raising blocks, his passenger leaned forward and said, „Would you please be more careful? I have six children at home.”
„Scheesch lady,” murmured the cabbie. „You got six kids and ya got the nerve to tell ME to be careful?”
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